google-site-verification=7uKx5_fN3o3T5QzA32ghvf9sBTlYQ7L5-Vdakr72l3Q Keeping my Door open

Keeping my Door open

Updated: Mar 23

Some thoughts.

Last week, looking at what's happening in the world right now, I decided to go “live” on Facebook every day in order to share something useful to make people feel supported - but I started experiencing technical issues.

So I did my best to record and post new videos, but I started experiencing troubles with it too - first the audio, then I uploaded on YouTube and shared on facebook, but a Facebook bug started hiding my posts, even those with the videos shared from YouTube. It was just a facebook "bug" which got fixed in two days, but the timing was interesting.

I observe what happens to and around me and consider that information a teaching.

But sometimes it is not easy to distinguish between a “test” in which you are challenged to show more perseverance and an invitation to silence.

So I just invoked more clarity. Last night I had a dream, one of those dream-not-dream, in which I feel like I’m visiting another dimension to learn something.

I don’t mind whether they are just dreams or something more, because I value the message and not the dimension from which it comes from, whether it is a spiritual dimension or the dimension of my consciousness.

In the dream, I was sitting on my carpet, in the middle of nowhere, in the darkness. I was calm and serene as usual (you know, I think I’m just drawn that way). After a while immersed in this bliss, I felt like I had to “do” something. I started thinking “what am I doing here? I should be doing something for the people out there instead!”

But then I suddenly woke up, aware of the message.

I am always “doing” something for everybody out there.

I feel so lucky and blessed that I am so happy when I can share what I receive.

But I tend to forget how much I have been working in order to achieve the gifts I have been blessed with. And I give away so much, constantly, spending a lot of time in creating content I love to share for free.

For me, it is a way to give back what I received, especially last year, when I overcame the painful and invalidating symptoms of CFS/ME.

I think I will keep doing this, because I feel I’m just drawn that way 😊

But I felt that in this precise moment when almost all the world is called to slow down and just “listen”, I am called to do the same.

Slow down and stop “doing” too much.

This is the pattern I’m going to break - related to my empathy, sense of responsibility and sense of duty: a mix which usually brings me to “fill the voids” and support everybody in any circumstance, even anticipating other’s needs.

Will I do more “lives”? Maybe.

Will I post new videos? I think so…

Will I be available for anybody who wants to contact me, needing something? Of course.

My door is always open.

I am just stopping the “doing” coming from my urge - and need - to “do something” even before people ask me.

I choose spontaneity instead of anticipation (it’s much easier to replace a habit with something more functional than just to break it).

I am freeing myself from feeling obliged to do so (or “something”) every day.

This is what I’m ready to let go in this last day of Winter (yes, this year Spring is coming earlier).

I am enjoying the quiet of my house, the presence of my cats, the creativity of my son, the messages of my husband (who is abroad following a course), and from now on I will enjoy the spontaneous impulse to share anything, old or new, with all of you.

And now I feel now much more aligned with the invitation we are getting from this moment.

Slow down, observe, listen. Be with yourself. Be yourself. Find who you are, independently from what you “do”.

Is there anything you can enjoy letting go today? Find it and let it go.

Love, blessings and a big hug ✨


© 2018 by Monica Canducci. All Rights Reserved.